Critically Stable

We just woke up and did rounds. Michael is in a 'critically stable' state. He did not tolerate the flutter or sotalol very well. He is back on a breathing machine and has a scalp IV now. They are possibly going to put a PICC line back in and another arterial line. They can't sedate him because they don't know if he will be able to handle it. He is now under pretty close supervision by the doctors and nurses. They were told to watch his monitors very closely and stay at his bedside. Bryttney and I are worn out. This is exhausting and now there seems to be no end in site. They are all amazed at how much he can handle, but apparently the sotalol was the tipping point. They are trying to let him balance himself out again. His lungs are very wet, they are calling it a 'white out.' The Gradient of his mitral valve is pretty bad and they think that is what is backing up the blood into the lungs.  We don't have any answers yet, but from the sounds of things this morning it sounds like they are going to try to find that sweet spot again. They will try to get him to a point where is stable enough to eat and grow and then worry about his mitral valve later. If they can't find that balance they might have to start thinking about surgery again. Thank you all for your support, it is hard to have any emotions at all during a time like this. I don't know if I'm sad or worried or what. I am just numb. I am glad he is getting extra attention, but we are both in a state of melancholy. This is draining and exhausting. I think we are going to try to give him a blessing today. He Seems pretty comfortable, but hopefully we can help the doctors find the best cure for him. It feels like we are back at square one.